Well…I wish I had more progress to report this month. I don’t know why I have held so much importance on this 6 month benchmark for myself. I really don’t see any difference in my 5 month pictures and my 6 month pictures. Other than I need another tan…I might even see a bit of gaining, or maybe that is in my head, or just from not getting enough water intake yesterday.
I guess I was thinking I would be in stage shape by now!
But, then I remember where I started….
I started out with a 30 day promise. I thought it would be nice to be looking good for my birthday/New Years. That came and went and I kept going. It was just so easy, and so fun. The time was going to pass anyway, why not do something productive with it? By month 3 I knew I was addicted and said I have to give this at least 6 months.
I don’t know why but somewhere along the way I got it in my head that 6 months is the magic number. By then I will have accomplished what I wanted. All these other girls did right? All these girls on Facebook, and Instagram. All the girls I have been following for inspiration, advice, motivation, knowledge about this process. They can cut down to there ideal physique in 12 weeks! Why can’t I do that?? Or did I? Why is what I have not what I want?
Well those girls have been at this game for years. They have been through this process dozens of times. This is my first go around. I am still learning. My body is still changing. It is still recovering from the hell I have put it through over the years starving myself chasing that skinny dream my whole life. I cannot compare my month six to their month 36.
I think I have reached every goal I set for myself at the beginning of this. I surpassed 30 days and blew it out of the water. I flew past losing 7 pounds of fat, and hit 10. I have leaned out all the areas of my body I was hoping for and I now flaunt every single one of them. I wear whatever I want. I am squatting over 200 lbs. I can do chin ups. I can do dips. I have abs.
Gone is my unhealthy relationship with food. Not knowing what is good/bad for me. No more feeling bad about myself, guilty, ashamed, disappointed, or using food to reward or punish myself. Food is my fuel, to help reach my goal. It is a tool for me to use, for anyone to use, to get healthy and happy.
I started out scared to death that my trainer was making me eat too much food. I fought tooth and nail, didn’t trust the process. Two days ago I told her I didn’t think I was eating ENOUGH! WTF!? This is funny because if you know me you know I am never NOT eating…lol. Every single thing I told my trainer I wanted in the very beginning I now have, And more. But, now I guess my goals have changed…They are now bigger.
I am so happy with what I have accomplished, and where I am. I don’t recognize that person 6 months ago and cannot believe that was me. I can never go back there. But that is no longer enough for me. Maybe 2014 wont be my year, maybe 2015 will be. 2014 is the year I realize what I want and how to get there. My new goal is 6 more months. There I said it.